PMS
by Isuzu-Hanabi-Chan
Summary: Most of the female Fruits Basket gang PMS some time or other. So then why does no one talk about it? Come and see what happens when it happens! Be sure to expect some slight OOC ON INDEFINITE HIATUS
1. Arisa Uotani

**-PMS-**

**ARISA UOTANI**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Fruits Baket, Natsuki Takaya-san does.**

* * *

The gang are all at school, and are about to commence their Japanese class. The bell has not yet rung, telling them to return to their seats, but it should do so shortly.

"Hi Uo-chan! How are you today? It's too bad it's raining outside… I would have liked to eat the food I" Tohru was saying, cheerfully.

"Honestly Tohru-chan, I don't really give **A CRAP**." Uo replied, not even facing her.

"Oh, ano… Umm… I guess I'll go… Umm…" Tohru told Uo-chan, with a sad expression on her face. She was walking back when suddenly someone jumped on her back.

"NOOO Tohru!" said Uo sobbing. "It's just that… sniff just that… sob…" Uo tried to tell her. Tohru was in utter dizziness mode.

"Ano… Uo… You aren't mad at me?" Tohru asked, rubbing her head.

"NOOOO! It's just that… sniff… I'm sorry, I usually never cry… WAHHHH" Uo fell to the ground and began sobbing uncontrollably. Her shoulders shook with each new outburst. Tohru tried to calm her, and found that hugging Uo-chan was the best way to calm her. Uo's cries were slowly calmed down and reduced to snivels.

"Arigato, Tohru. So umm… sniff my dad, well you know how usually he never cleans anything? Actually I've never even seen him clean anything… The idiot, he makes me do ALL THE WORK!" She screamed this part so loud, many of the students in the class turned around to see what all the commotion was. Tohru flew back in surprise.

"ahem Well, yesterday he was cleaning under my bed in my room and you know what he did? **DO YOU KNOW, TOHRU**!" She screamed, shaking Tohru's shoulders. Tohru shook her head no, frightened.

"**HE THREW OUT MY STUFFED BUNNYYYYY, MY BELOVED FLUFFYYYYY**!" Uo cried. She was red and crying at the same time. She was sitting on the floor and hitting it with her fists She got up and began to kick people around.

"Uo-chan… Ano… Maybe he umm… Threw it out because he didn't think you used it anymore?" Tohru told her. Uo, holding a squirming male student, let him fall to the floor and looked at her sadly.

"Tohru-chan, I loved that thing! You have no idea how much me and Fluffy had been through… sniff I miss hiiiiimmmmm…" She began to cry.

"Errr… Ano…" Tohru was shocked. Sh had no clue what she should say or do to make her tough girl Uo become herself again.

"Uo-chan. Don't bother Tohru-chan when you're PMSing. Go in the corner and have some of this." Hana-chan said, appearing out of nowhere. She pointed to a corner of the class with a chocolate in her hand. Uo-chan grabbed it greedily and stuck her tongue out at Hana-chan for no apparent reason. She made her way to the corner, eliminating everything in her way. Hana sighed.

"It's okay now, Tohru-chan. Uo is simply… Having a bad day."

"Ano… O… Kay…" Tohru said, still in shock.

"Hey Yankee, I guess you're still a loser, hmm? Hana-chan is like your mom, telling you to go in the corner to pout. Haha!" Kyo told Uo mockingly. She turned around and her face was dirtied with slobber and chocolate. Her eyes were wide and she had a sickening frown on her face. She looked like a weird monster.

"Shut up!** I MISS FLUFFY! WAHHHHHH**…" Uo said, angrily. She tried to bite Kyo. She seemed rabid so Kyo ran away as Uo-chan began sobbing crazily. He was in absolute shock. Hana-chan shook her head at Uo-chan.

'_What the… Fluffy…?' _Kyo asked himself as he stopped running.

* * *

_Heehee! What do you all think? I felt like making a comedy-ish story… I bet you all thought I'd start with Tohru, huh? Well, I've tricked YOUUUU! _

_They will be short drabbles about all the Fruits Basket gang Pmsing. It's my little break from doing Lovely America, it gets really tiring. Anyway, please review and tell me if it's any good. Also, you can give me suggestions for the next PMSed person I should do. _

_Meow. Until next time._


	2. Kagura Sohma

**PMS**

**Kagura Sohma **

* * *

"Moooom! Helppp meeeee!" Came a muffled cry from Kagura's room. Her mother ran worriedly to her room, hoping it wasn't a robber… MAYBE IT WAS A RAPIST! After all, Kagura-chan did like to keep her window open at night… Oh dear, she was about to find her daughter, slaughtered! Poor, whimpering and- 

But instead, she found Kagura in her bed not moving.

"Kagura-chan! What's wrong honey!" Her mother asked, quickly, going to her side of the bed and squeezing her hand tightly.

"Well, Mommy… Well…" Kagura began, looking straight to the ceiling.

"KAGURA! You will never leave your window open again, okay? I'm so sorry I didn't think of it before, sweetie…" Her mother told her, whilst hugging her.

"AHHH MOM STOOOOP! What is wrong with you? The only thing that's wrong is that my back is in such pain that I can't even move, and you just worsened it when you hugged me!" Kagura said as she began wailing incredibly loud.

"EEEAHHH! What's wrong my littleKaguraaa…" Kagura's mother looked at her daughter sadly.

"What the hell is going on in here? Jesus…" Rin said as she peeked into Kagura's room, then walked away to the bathroom.

" **sniff...** MOM Rin-san hates me!" Kagura was kicking and screaming in her bed. Her mother was hopelessly trying to calm her down with her arms outstretched. Rin, who heard this from the bathroom, rolled her eyes.

"You know you're just PMSing, you baka." She screamed from outside the door.

"Lunch is served!" Tohru exclaimed from in the kitchen. Shigure ran to the table, followed by Yuki and Kyo walking slowly.

"Ahhh my flower! What have you made for us today?" Shigure asked enthusiastically. Yuki stared him down and Shigure innocently raised his shoulders.

"I have made beef soup! You know, the one that Haru enjoys…" Tohru told him, pointing her finger to the ceiling.

"Oh flower! Have you never realized that Kyon-Kichi likes all your meals better than Hatsuharu-kun?" Shigure laughed. Tohru cutely looked around, much too naive to understand what Shigure was talking about.

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, BAKA! STOP CALLING ME SILLY NAMES!" Kyo demanded, red as a chili pepper. He punched Shigure's cheek with extreme force. Shigure fell to the floor with a thud.

"Oh noo… I'm sorry. I guess Kyo-kun does not like beef soup… Gomen nasai…" Tohru said, nostalgically. Before Kyo could reply, Yuki said something.

"There goes that baka neko, messing everything up again." He said calmly sipping his herbal tea. Kyo was balling his fist and about to reply but was interrupted again by someone different this time.

"Kyo-kun?" The timid voice asked.

'_KAGURA!'_ Everyone thought.

"Urrm… BYEIHAVETOGOBUYUHH…MILK!" Kyo said as he began dashing out the door.

"Oh. Okay." Kagura simply said. Everyone sweatdropped.

"Urr Kagura… You aren't going to chase me?" asked Kyo, who had run all the way back because this was all too curious. She shook her head as she closed her eyes. She began crying.

"I'm no longer attracted to you, Kyo-kun, I'm afraid." She told them with a sad frown.

"Oh… Well… umm…" Kyo stuttered. Truly, Kyo was rejoicing. He very well couldn't say that though.

"Well, Kagura-san, is there anything I can get you to eat?" Tohru asked sweetly.

"HECK YES THERE IS! GIVE ME PICKLES NOWWWW!" She became her normal self, screaming and all. The only strange thing was that she was crying at the same time.

"Uhmm… Gomen, Tohru. Could you get me pickles though? Don't know what just came over me. I'm having a problem todayy..." Tohru nodded slowly, because she was very confused…

"Kagura-san, why are you crying?" Yuki asked, handing her a hankie. She refused it.

"I'm not sure, Yun-chan… (Yuki wondered why she called him that…) I've been crying and my back's been hurting and I've been eating pickles… Oh it's all just soo strange…" She said, still sobbing powerfully. Tohru ran to the table with her head low, serving the pickles to Kagura. She grabbed the plate and swallowed eight of them without chewing once.

"Kagura-san! You'll choke if you do that!" Yuki told her, while he lightly touched her sleeve and gazed into her eyes. His eyes were such a clear purple… How beautiful he was when he worried for her!Actually... He was always so beautiful!

_'Ohh Yun-chann! I guess I've always kind of beenattracted to you!'_ She blushed and cried harder. Yuki seemed like he had lost hope.

"YUN-CHAAAAN STOOOP! I LOVE YOU, OKAY? JUST… GO AWAY!" Kagura yelled and began kicking the table. It fell over. She paused, resumed her crying,and stomped to the front door.

'What is she going on about…?' Yuki wondered…

When Kagura opened the door to leave, she found a dark girl standing outside.

"Hello… Is everything alright here?" Hanajima asked, while looking down.

"No. Come inside." Kagura yelled while crying. She pulled Hana-chan inside with force.

An hour later, Kagura and Hana were still talking about depression.

"I just feel like… No one wants me in the world." Kagura confided.

"Everyone feels like that sometimes." Hana told her.

"But I feel so confused and alone!" Kagura tried.

"But you're not. Look where you are, surrounded by the people you love." Hana told her, holding her hands.

"Oh Hana-chan… You've helped me so much! WAHH" Kagura leaned into Hana's dark mauve shirt and sobbed. Hana mouthed to Tohru that Kagura would be okay. Tohru smiled and nodded.

"Hanajima-san… You are my idol! I want to be just like you!" Kagura told her with wide eyes. Hana nodded, not knowing what to say.

Kagura rushed to the mall after being consoled by Hana. She realized only now, how silly of her! It was her and Yun-chan that were meant to be, not her and Kyo-kun! What a silly joke. And he would only love her if she was perfect, like Hanajima-sensei! So that was why Rin wore dark clothes too... She tried on a very dark black dress and bought it. She bought many otherdark things. She wore it home and replaced the heart-shaped photo frame with a picture of Kyo-kun in itwitha pictureof Yuki-kun. Rin asked Kagura what was wrong with Kagura-chan's brain today and Kagura wept and slammed her now darkbluebedroom door.

_'Hana-sensei… We were destined to meet and become best friends… Yun-chan… I love you so much… You're so handsome…'_ She said before falling asleep under her new black bed sheet.

**THE NEXT MORNING**

"WHAT THE HELLLL!" Kagura yelled once again in her house. Her mother ran to her room, knowing not to expect rapists this time.  
"sigh What's wrong, Kagura-chan?"

"Why am I wearing these… Gothic clothes?" Kagura asked, disgusted. She noticed her bed and much of her room was different too.

"I don't know Kagura… You were very mad last night, and you kept saying something about 'Hana-sensei' or something…" her mother told her.

"Really? I don't know any Hanas… AND WHAAAAT IS THAT!" She said, pointing at a heart framed photo of Yuki-kun. It was supposed to be Kyo-kun in there!

"You were also saying something about how you loved Yun-chan last night, I think." Her mother replied.

"No no no. I think you didn't hear right, Mother. I love Kyo-kun!" Kagura insisted. Rin looked in Kagura's bedroom and peeked in to speak with Kagura.

"Kagura. When you get PMS, one of the symptoms is memory loss. Just so you know." She told her. Rin walked away, rolling her eyes.

"Mom, I think something's wrong with Isuzu-san today…" Kagura whispered to her mother. Her mother shook her head and closed her eyes.

"Daughter, I believe it is you who has any kind of problem. Now, come have some breakfast, okay?" Kagura looked confused.

* * *

_Heehee! This one is definetly not as funny as the other one, but still quite funny. Thanks for reading, I know this one was pretty long…_

_Bye! Until next time! ;)_


	3. Saki Hanajima

**-PMS-**

**SAKI HANAJIMA**

* * *

"Hold still please, Megumi." Hanajima asked roughly. She was dressing him up in a pink dress with blue ribbons in his hair. He felt (and looked) like an idiot.

"Saki-chan… I'll ask one last time… What are you doing…" Megumi asked as he squirmed in the dress. She held him tightly, looked into his eyes. She frowned, then went back to her work, and never replied.

"Saki, I thought you only liked dark colours…" He asked quietly.

"…Megumi, please close your mouth now." Saki replied curtly. Megumi sighed, and then began to sulk.

**__**

**_LATER ON_**

"Mother, I am going shopping with the girls. I'll be back around one." Saki said, as she trotted down the stairs. Her mother peeked from the stairs to find Hanajima wearing a sky blue tank top with a jean skirt. Her hair was in two pigtails secured with two pink ribbons.

"Dear, are you feeling alright today?" She asked, politely. Saki shook her head no.

"I'll be back later." Hanajima repeated.

"Oh, I sort of would have liked for you to watch Megumi-chan, I'm going out later on and" Her mother was saying before being interrupted.

"I DON'T CARE!" Saki exclaimed. She felt her breathing pattern change quickly and looked at her balled up fists. She began to have a coughing fit. What was wrong with her, today?

"A… Ano… Maybe you should go out, actually…" Mrs. Hanajima suggested. As she finished saying this, Hanajima slowly marched out the door and waved her hand behind her. The mother gulped. As she watched her daughter skip down the driveway (very unusual…), her son was carefully walking down the stairs in a flowing pink sash-like dress. He had pigtails in his hair, and was wearing yellow eyeliner. His nails were light green. The mother began laughing as she collapsed to the floor. Megumi was not amused.

"My daughter and my son have finally turned into normal teenagers… Well, sort of scary ones, but nonetheless! I won't have to keep buying all those black clothes now!" Mrs. Hanajima said. Megumi sighed.

"How can you women wear this stuff on your eyes? It bothers me…" He said, scratching his eyelids. His mother went up to him and gave him a great big hug. She laughed. Megumi cleared his throat.

"Mom, you do know this is your favorite pashmina I'm wearing. Saki sewed it up so it would make a dress for me. I think she's sick today or something." Megumi told her. She instantly stopped laughing.

On the way to meet the girls, Saki noticed she had been eating chocolate.

'What is wrong with me …' she asked herself, as she stared at the piece of chocolate. She threw it on the ground and began to sob. She sat on the pavement and cried so loud, she could have sworn she heard some dogs bark. Suddenly, she stopped.

'I sense Tohru waves!' she thought. She got up, jogged to the area where the Tohru waves were coming from. Tears streamed down her face, and suddenly, she saw Tohru from the back. She ran up to her, and gave her a great big hug. The girl yelped loudly.

"TOHRU-CHAAAAAN…" Saki sobbed loudly. The girl turned around and was not Tohru. She appeared to be very frustrated.

"You freak! Who the heck are you? My name is Lin Wei, so what the hell… Who's this Tohru person you speak of! See, this is why I hate walking on this street, something bad always happens! RAH, and now look what you've done, you baka person! I've missed my job interview! Go bug someone else, okay? Thanks for making this day the worst one in my life!" The girl said, as she too began to sob. She ran to the bus terminal. Saki was despaired. Even her powers were defective. She sat on the sidewalk and reflected upon all this for a while.

_****_

_**EVEN LATER ON**_

The policeman on duty found a girl who looked a lot like this Saki Hanajima character he was supposed to find near a dumpster downtown. She looked half dead.

"Excuse me, ma'am… Would you happen to be Miss Saki Hanajima…?" He said, waiting for an answer. She slowly turned her head towards him, smiling.

"A girl missed her job interview because of my stupidity, a man gave me money and a beggar tried to rape me. Do I look like bleeping Hanajima Saki to you?" She said still smiling. He seemed horrified.

"A…Ano… Well…" He stared at the frail girl. Her tank top's skinny strap was falling off her shoulder, and she appeared to b slightly drunk. A bottle of rum sat beside her. Where she got that, he did not know. She giggled scarily as she crawled towards him. He stepped back.

"I… I'm armed, little lady! Don't you try anything!" He told her, lightly touching his gun. He was afraid.

"Take me home, honey." She said, jumping into his arms. He caught her, and she seemed to be fast asleep. He blushed and slapped his face. He saw that this was indeed the girl he was looking for. He threw her over his shoulder.

"Stu… Stupid kids. This discourages me to have any ever…"

* * *

Yeehaw! Sorry I haven't updated in sooo long. I was on vaction for Spring Break, So I needed a little break, you know? Anyway, I'll be updating Lovely America later on… So sorry for the wait!

Until next time.


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